Things are never as bad as they seem. At least that's what people tell you when they're trying to make you feel better. They also say, "Things always look better in the morning after a good night's sleep". Do they though?
I guess it all depends on what you're going through. I think the best advice I've ever gotten was in 2007 after my Dad passed away. He died December 31, 2006 which was the worse time for him to die. It was 5:31am in the morning when I got the phone call and it ruined my life for two years.
The advice I was told came from my boyfriends stepfather. He said just deal with each day as it comes; that's all you can do. I guess it stems from the saying that all misery stems from thinking about the past and worrying about the future. People would save themselves a whole lot of trouble if they kept in the moment, right now - at any given time.
I'm writing this article from a place where I was severely overwhelmed, running on next to no sleep and things just kept coming at me. Currently, I'm on the other side of the worst of it and I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I think this period of my life ran for about two to three weeks.
I remember planning for an already busy week ahead and then I got something in the mail that I wasn't really expecting. It was a daunting task that would take team work to complete, and there was also a deadline on it. Another thing kind of fell into my lap and so I found myself dealing with that at the same time. The second thing also had a deadline, but if it worked, it would help us tremendously. So really, the deadline was something that was worth the effort.
At the same time, I had to do my Amazon storefront, and my website which I had just opened the previous month and I was still trying to upload stickers onto. One of the most important things was helping my son study for his provincial achievement tests at the end of June.
I'm a Type A personality person who feels like I need to do all the things. I have been training myself to manage my time and look at tasks responsibly. For example, when I use my Franklin planner, I may not write down which task is a priority, but in my head, I know. So I'm usually pretty good and I know how to keep a calm demeanour when things start looking overwhelming.
In this case though, maybe it was also peri-menopause looming over my shoulder, but I kind of broke down. I had flashbacks at karaoke as some of my PTSD came roaring back and completely ruined my evening. It was a rough night. It was at this point that I realized I had to start going easy on myself.
When times like this arise, I really start to chill and dial it back a bit. I make sure I'm reflecting more on my actions - that might mean journaling more, or being more intentional with what I write in my morning pages. I also tend to meditate, or sit and listen to the birds. Reading is good for me too. I like being alone - I notice that I get over-stimulated faster when I'm in these situations, so when I start to feel angry or frustrated around my family, I tell them I love them but I just a need a bit of alone time, even if it's for ten minutes or so.
Most importantly, I listened to the advice I was given all those years ago - the only thing that's really going to solve anything is time. As cliche as that sounds, it is so true. Even if you have a rough day, once it's over, it's over forever and as long as you keep moving forward but stay present in the moment, eventually the bad days will be behind you and opportunity and abundance will find you again.
Me taking it day by day looked like plugging through, even though I met so many distractions along the way. I would tackle one of the important tasks and then feel immense relief that it was done, but then immediately dive into the next one.
I made goals for myself the week of writing this also that I would try and maintain integrity to my schedule - get the things done in the scheduled day so I wouldn't have runaway tasks. Well, that goal flopped a bit when this blog itself got written on the Wednesday instead of the Tuesday. At least I did it right away and I stuck to my schedule for the most part. I caught up quickly but then didn't get mad at myself for falling behind either. I just accepted it and moved on.
In these moments, I think that's all we can do. Just do the best you can - be productive as you can without wearing yourself down or making yourself sick. When you know it's time for a break, take the break. Hopefully you feel refreshed after and you can get back into the work. It might not work that way all the time, but at least if you try it's better than giving up.
So for anyone right now who finds themselves in the same boat that I was in - know that as you plug along and try to get through the tasks at hand, the days are passing. This too shall come to pass and I know you will get through it and come out on the other side.
Good luck and cheers!
Sandra ❤️
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